First off, let me say thank you for all of the amazing support everyone has shown us over the last few days. We are beyond grateful for your kind words and prayers. Before next week, when we find out if this current round of shots is working, I thought it would be good to catch everyone up on how we got to this point. So, grab a bag of popcorn and enjoy part 1 of the our “ectopic pregnancy saga”.
We all create mental images of how certain events will play out in our lives; proposals, weddings, finding out you’re expecting. This is natural and expected. One day I’ll share our proposal story with everyone (probably on a day when we all need a good laugh). Since deciding to start trying for our family, I’ve thought a lot about that moment of finding out we’re pregnant. How will I tell Daniel, will I already “know” I’m pregnant before taking the test, how and when will we tell others. So needless to say, that moment did not play out the way I expected it to when in January I find myself on my back in the ER being told “So, did you know you’re pregnant?”.
Let’s back up a little.
It’s December 2014, Daniel and I were getting ready to go visit my family in South Carolina for the holiday. I had no indications that I was indeed pregnant (no morning sickness, fatigue, anything), but knowing that there would be alcohol involved in our visit I thought it was best to take a pregnancy test anyways. It was a day before my expected period, but I decided to test anyways instead of doing so after getting up there. It was negative. Now I know what some of you are thinking, it could have been a faint line that I didn’t notice. Trust me, when you want to be pregnant you analyze that little piece of plastic with a magnifying glass. There was not even a hint of a positive line and the next day my period started on time. Oh well I thought, it can take a few months to conceive. This was something I was mentally prepared for. So off we go to South Carolina where I enjoy my mimosa over Christmas breakfast.
Fast forward to New Year’s Eve.
I’m sitting in a recliner relaxing when our dog Abe decides to jump into the chair with me. Keep in mind he is a 70lb Goldendoodle (see picture) and I am (not disclosing my weight) a petite 4’11” chick. All this to say, it hurt. He nailed me right in the gut with his back paws on my upper thighs. Later that evening I get what felt like really bad menstrual cramps. I pop an Advil and don’t think too much about it, until I wake up in the morning with even worse cramps and a radiating pain down my right leg. Again, I take some medicine and go back to sleep. When I wake up again I’m feeling better and am just glad that is over with. I figure Abe got me good..
My amazing husband, Daniel, and our Goldendoodle, Abe.
Fast forward to Monday.
Our church starts our bi-annual 21 Days of Prayer & Fasting. Daniel and I decided to do a Daniel Fast (this is a real fast not a fast of foods that my Daniel wants to eat, haha!). We started eliminating caffeine and sugar over the weekend and head off to early morning prayer with juice/water in hand. Toward the end of the prayer time I start to feel icky like my stomach is upset, so I excuse myself to the bathroom. But nothing happens except that the cramping gets worse, I start to feel nauseous, and as I’m walking back to find Daniel I felt like I was going to pass out. We head home, I call in sick to work, pop some more medicine and head back to bed. I wake up feeling exhausted, but better for the most part. I decide the caffeine/sugar withdrawal hit me harder than expected and maybe I was coming down with something, so I drink lots of water, break my fast and eat a can of soup, and take it easy the rest of the day.
Fast forward to Saturday (January 10th)
Daniel’s parents came into town to deliver furniture that his sister and brother-in-law no longer wanted and we gladly took off their hands. During breakfast I once again begin to feel bad and excuse myself to the bathroom. Once again, nothing except that the pain got worse. His mom jokes that maybe I’m pregnant and I assure her I’m not. They are so ready to be grandparents so I didn’t want her to have any false hopes. I pop more medicine, jump under a heating pad and figure it too will pass. They head back home and Daniel heads off to go hunting. Now please know that Daniel asked several times if I wanted him to stay home and I assured him that I was fine. Throughout the day the pain got better and then worse again. Daniel called to say he was on his way back (an hour + drive) and during that time the pain got exceedingly worse. The radiating pain in my leg was back and I was beyond uncomfortable. I called a good friend of mine who’s a pharmacist and he says it’s possibly my appendix and that if it gets worse I should go to the hospital.
By the time Daniel got home I knew something bad was wrong and we decided to go to an urgent care facility that was directly across from the hospital in hopes that we could get in and out quicker than the ER. They too ask if I’m pregnant and I tell them all the reasons why I don’t think I am and they too think it may be my appendix, give me a shot of pain medicine (to keep me comfortable), and send us off to the ER. Let me just say that the shot in the rear I received to “make me comfortable” didn’t do a thing and the pain just got worse as we waited. Finally we made it back to a room to be seen by a doctor and I can almost for certain tell you that when I got up on the gurney that is the exact moment that the rupture occurred. I have never been in that much pain in my life. I sent Daniel to go track down a doctor/nurse/heck anyone at that point to help. A nurse came rushing in, saw me in pain, and rushed out again. Thankfully she returned quickly and hooked up an IV of anti-nausea medicine followed by morphine and then we waited for the medicine to take effect. Three rounds of IV pain meds later I finally, while not pain-free, was comfortable enough to answer questions and be touched.
And then there comes the doctor, “Well the good news is that I don’t think it’s your appendix. So, did you know you’re pregnant.”
That moment I had envisioned of seeing the pregnancy test turn positive and then gleefully telling Daniel he is going to be daddy was gone. Instead, I am drugged up on pain meds and Daniel looks like he’s seen a ghost and there was no joy, no excitement, no yay it happened! Instead, you could almost feel the sadness, the fear, the this can’t be happening to us. But it was. They quickly explained that they thought I was experiencing a ruptured ectopic pregnancy and prepared me for surgery.
But let me tell you, God was there with us. Amidst the pain and sadness we felt Him working in ways it’s hard to explain. Our nurse had also experienced an ectopic pregnancy and was beyond empathetic and encouraging. The on-call OB-GYN was the doctor I had heard great things about, but was booked up patient wise and I hadn’t been able to get her as a doctor. She was as great as i had been told. I had just switched on to Daniel’s health insurance plan at the beginning of the year and we quickly realized the difference in payment everything was on his plan compared to my old plan with my employer. We would still be paying everything off if the rupture occurred New Year’s Eve. We were beyond grateful that we didn’t know we were pregnant and hadn’t gotten attached to the idea yet. It was little things, but those little things gave us peace in the storm and we were so thankful!